THE NEVER ENDING QUESTION

There are years that question

and years that respond
One day, in the future, there will be a story
about my 19 self asking life:
how to be sure that I would finally find someone?

Cause' I mistakenly trapped myself in this narrow mind—

a crowded place that's perfect to be not okay

Since as if beauty was limited 

and love seemed shady

I suddenly feared of losing you,

of being lonely,

of finding no one to share a cup of coffee,

of forever feeling restless, 
of still being too hard to myself,

and of not knowing how to deal with
every mess I've ever made

It's so nice

when I look at you

and you already staring

It's so true, If I wonder love is worth fighting for,

and when I remember your face,

I am ready for the war

But it's still such a bitter pill

when I got no answer

about

is it true

you are the one I should be waiting for

or chasing after?

It has always been you

But for the next,

it would be too difficult, painful, complicated,

and impossible to be you   

 

(Dinar Astari)